If it's not Raven, it's crap...

Brooks & Der Teigel , keepin it real On Saturday, I woke up. Having not fucked around with too much random alcohol, I was doing pretty ok. Schmidt and I managed to make it to a restaurant/café near the Rübenkamp S-Bahn station, which despite being way-ass far from our apartment, is good for some brunchy good times. We usually meet up there when Cracky McGee is in town visiting his sister. This time Der Teigel was present. Der Teigel is one of Schmidt's old chums from Dortmund. I met him once around five years ago, when he came to visit Schmidt while he was still living in the dorm. He's way fun -- and I fully believe that he should teach Schmidt about talking to girls, cause he's way good at it. ( Click Below for More ) Anyway, to appease the Bed Bitch , later on in the day I procured some felt and foam to make my bed squeak-free. Henceforth, you are dead to me, Bed Bitch . Then, it was on to more partying. The Boy turned 21 yesterday and two of his friends ( The ...

I only had a 3-day work week last week. I took Thursday and Friday off to make the last preparations for Schmidt’s birthday jamboree and to go to German court. You’d think that I’d take more time off to prepare for the latter, but you would be wrong. Originally, I planned to go to court on Thursday and then just come to work later. But, after looking at my to-do list for Schmidt’s party, I realized I probably wouldn’t get it all done in a timely fashion and to my liking unless I used two whole vacation days. What can I say? I’m quite fond of my roommate. I will post photos, as soon as the party’s official unofficial photographer, Cracky McGee , uploads the bajillion pictures he took during the course of the evening. Schmidt’s present? Well, I must say it went down quite well. Over the past few weeks, I contacted some of his friends, met up with a couple of them to buy a skateboard, and then commissioned an airbrush dude to emblazon said skateboard with the words „Fuck Swords“. Also,...

Please watch the following videos and reconsider your stance on being zombies with me: Zombie-American Chapter One on FunnyOrDie.com Zombie American - Chapter 2 on FunnyOrDie.com Zombie American - Chapter 3 on FunnyOrDie.com I cannot wait to partake of some taco goodness with you this evening. You're the bestest roommate ever! Brooks

Despite the apparent “youth outreach program” (haha) that I seem to currently be running, I’m not a big fan of the youngins and do not usually consider myself a champion of their causes – even though I, too, was once a wee Raven. But I got over it. Yesterday afternoon I had a very interesting conversation with Schmidt about child rearing. It was really a discussion that would be of interest to no one other than…well…no one. But we had it anyway. Schmidt wondered if it would be better to present information to children, the same way that it is presented to adults. I countered that children are probably not capable of processing information the same way as adults are. He posed the question of whether adults underestimate children’s capabilities. Much pondering ensued. Although I’ve been around and taken care of a bunch of other people’s children throughout the years, I felt like I could really only base my stance on the topic on how I remember myself as a child. Granted, by the time I e...

I started planning out Schmidt's birthday in my head around the end of last month/beginning of this one. I feel like Schmidt hasn't really given it that much thought at all. As he put it, "What happened to the days when you could just buy a bunch of beer and invite people over? The rest pretty much works itself out..." This was apparently the strategy he used for our housewarming party. Ahem...*cough cough* I honestly don't know why I'm putting so much effort into this shindig. It's kinda crazy if you think about it, because it's not like it's MY birthday or anything and if it were, I probably wouldn't really give a shit. However, I have an uncontrollable urge make my roommate smile and I want everything to be just right. 27 was a rough year for him, I feel like Year 28 should start out on the right foot. The foot of awesomeness, that is. This is why I spent a good portion of the evening baking a test cake. I've made quite a few cakes in ...

I'm pretty sure what Dave Chappelle is trying to say is that he understand and supports the Mulatto Revolution in the most important way -- though he might say a lot of racist stuff his "penis is a humanitarian"... word?

Although I dislike the idea of Schmidt being cooped up in the hospital, I'm quite enjoying the ability to be utterly lazy on a Sunday, without the guilt. Not that Schmidt verbally makes me feel guilty about sleeping til noon on a Sunday, but the mere fact that he's up bright and early, regardless of the previous evening's activities -- well, I just feel like it's pretty unfair. And I figured, since I just sent The Boy out on a snack-run to Lidl, that I should take a few minutes to update and tell y'all about the time that I got to go home early from work. See, remember when I told you about how the FHHM offices moved to the HafenCity area of Hamburg ? The new office is fantastic and the HafenCity area is going to be pretty swank...in like about seven years (or more). Right now, however, the general area surrounding the office is a giant construction site (see picture at the top of the post). Additionally, the HafenCity, being low-lying and close to water ( Hafen ...

I think Jay Smooth has placed a listening device in my brain, 'cause I swear I feel like I've had this same conversation multiple times in the past week: Amy Winehouse and the Ethics of Clowning People Anyway, check out the first few seconds of the video to see Amy Winehouse's jacked up European Music Award performance. Then, stick around for the rest of the video because Jay is awesome. THEN, go out and get some music by Sharon Jones & the Dap Kings and watch how grown-ass folks do music. Don't be like me -- a stupid idiot, who somehow missed out on their Hamburg show, despite it being advertised on the FHHM website.

I feel like I'm getting more and more behind on updating. Not for lack of ideas, simply lack of time. Plus, I also feel like every time I start writing something, there's someone looking over my shoulder reading it. This is literally the truth sometimes. Also, I've been doing news stories more frequently over at FHHM . And working on getting the next online issue...well, online. Hopefully, I done did it right...I will know Thursday. I don't even really have time right now for a thorough update and I apologize, but since we last spoke, I: - went with Etch to go sit in the audience at a German talk show . She had gotten free tickets, which included a couple of free alcoholic beverages. Hanging out with Etch is always fun, but she's no Oprah [EDIT: I meant to write that Britt is no Oprah. Etch is, in fact, 1,000,000 times more fun than Oprah] - got to visit with Franzi , which is also always fun. - got to go see Redman for free. - made acquaintances with a guy who r...