Filler Post #11 - Straight illin'

I can't think of a better way to begin the week. All sick and stuffed up, taking a generous swig from a bottle of DayQuil during my breaks and praying that one day I would be so lucky as to be able to afford the services of a handsome young man, whose only purpose would be to sit by my bedside whenever I'm sick, pat my forehead with a damp cloth, spoon feed me homemade chicken noodle soup, and occasionally lift a glass of water/Sprite/gin tonic to my lips for me to drink through a straw.

Ok, ideally, I wouldn't be paying for this and I hope that some hottie would just do this for me of his own free will. However, I think hiring someone for the job would be a good investment and money well spent.

Basically, I just want some fool to come and take care of me while I'm sick. I don't feel like this is too much to ask.