Jealous much?

I think I'm trying to make a point, bear with me now.

A few years ago, I saw a really shitty movie on TV.

It was called Love and a Bullet and starred Treach from Naughty By Nature. I actually started watching it because I saw Zack the Black Power Ranger in it and I thought to myself, "Wow, it's nice to see that he's found some more acting work."

In the movie, Treach plays some kind of introspective assassin dude (all "thinky" and shit) and falls in love with some other assassin chick or something. The plot is pretty much unimportant because it turns out that the film is, in essence, a softcore porn half-assedly masquerading as an action flick. A showcase for Treach's "piece", if you will...

And the proceeding information is pretty much irrelevant to the rest of what I'm getting to...other than the movie title is the first thing that came into my head while I was thinking of potential names for this post. Sorry for wasting your time.

Now where was I?

Oh yes...love and bullets...

I don't remember if I've mentioned it before (here or elsewhere) but my sister Robbyn is a fairly avid gun collector. She likes guns, she likes sci-fi...that's her thing.

A (long) while back, in an attempt to explain the workings of my family to Buche, I drew him a flowchart-type thing with names, nicknames and abbreviations for me and my seven siblings. I gave Robbyn the not entirely accurate nickname of "Crazy Man-Hating Sister".

I guess I should clear that up...Robbyn does not hate men. In fact, over the years, she's had quite a few really nice boyfriends. I guess their biggest fault over the years has been that they've all been pretty bitchmade. Especially the one who used to bring us fresh eggs from his grandparents' farm.

Also, the gun thing could have freaked a few out. Goddamn she's well-armed.

For the last few months Robbyn's been seeing this guy, we'll call him T. He's good-looking, considerate, genuinely interested in my sister, and they met in a gun shop...so they've got something to talk about when they go out.

T came over to our house last Saturday to hangout and he brought a backpack full of weapons with him. The two of them kind of sat around comparing handguns and handgun accessories. To say I found it a little bizzare would be an understatement, but I must say I was pretty pysched that Robbyn's found someone with whom she can share her interests...we should all be that lucky.

Before it was like a guy would come over to see "the collection", Robbyn would pull out her big-ass broadsword and the guy would say, "That's cool." But you could kinda tell he was pretty freaked out.

Today, when I came home from work, I noticed T's car parked out front by our house. When I got inside, I noticed Robbyn's door was open and T had kind of made a little spot for himself on her floor and he was watching TV, while Robbyn lay all bundled up on her bed sleeping. I thought that was a little bit strange until I went to the kitchen and I saw about 4 cans of chicken noodle soup and a box of saltine crackers.

I think I passed along my heinous sickness to Robbyn and she came home from work early. When T found out she wasn't feeling well, he came over with soup and crackers and set up camp in her room for a few hours to take care of her.

Seriously, Robbyn, dude, c'mon...seriously...