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Thursday, November 24, 2005

Ninjas is wilin'!

"Look at me, America! Look at how this ninja's liviiiin for the ciiitaaaay!"
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It's been a couple of year's since I've had a nice, enjoyable...fairly normal Thanksgiving. Probably like 3 years ago, to be exact. That particular Thanksgiving was spent in Maine with the Wheeler family. I was amazed by the fact that in a family of like 6 people, none of them fought for the turkey leg (they normally just gave the leg meat to the cat...but not that year, no sir)

Last Thanksgiving was spent in a boathouse by the Elbe River at the birthday party of the boyfriend of the younger sister of an acquaintance of mine...with a bunch of random East Germans. I played musical chairs (aka "Journey to Jerusalem" aka "Chair Dance"), got tore up drunk, stood (sort of) in front of the f6 cigarette factory and contemplated life while waiting for a tram, which took me to a hip-hop show (Ferris MC) that I was psyched about although it was dreadfully underattended. Then, after about an hour and a half, I took the tram to Pirnaischer Platz and contemplated the cobblestones before running headfirst into a large pole.

Come to think of it, this year won't be that much different 'cept the pole is more figurative.

Tonight, I decided since I don't have to report to work until 6pm tomorrow, I would buy myself a bottle of wine and some Popeye's fried chicken...

The thing about Popeye's is that, simply put, it is the bomb...

Fried Chicken Chain Bombness Scale
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It's also a lot more expensive than the other two places. However, it's also totally worth it.

The problem that I have with my neighborhood Popeye's is that they employ an overwhelming number of lazy-ass ninjas. It doesn't matter whether or not you go inside or through the drive-thru...them ninjas inside is straight lazy -- quite contrary to one's beliefs regarding ninja-ish behavior.

I actually used to own a copy of this book until I passed it on to Monroe, my prankster protege, at Senior Banquet. No where within its pages is "Do not man the fryer" listed as a tactic for defeating the enemy.
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This evening I decided to forego the outrageously long drive-thru line and proceed to the counter to place my order. Arriving inside, I noticed that I was the only patron physically inside of the building...and that there were 5 or 6 ninjas just choppin it up in the back. Not taking orders, not cooking...but just kickin it as though there weren't 10 cars backed up outside.

Then, the ninjas in the back spent about 10 minutes arguing about who was supposed to be working the cash register before they even took my order. Finally, one ninja's like "Well, it's gonna be about 20 minutes before your 8-piece is ready"

And part of me was like, "Ahhhh! You fuckin' lazy ninjas!!!" and the other part was
like "Whatev, at least I don't have to cook for myself"

But I waited almost 30 minutes for my food...and I did it with a smile...cause Popeye's is the shit...

And when I got home, I found that one of them ninjas had put a free cinnamon apple pie in my bag...

Stealthy motherfucker...

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