Skip to main content

"B**ch, I ain't got nothin'"




"...and I ain't payin for shit, I'm on the grind ho"
Image hosted by Photobucket.com


The "stupidest" thing I've said all day (aside from the conscious use of the word janky, which we'll get to in a bit):

"I apologize, sir, but a solution to your predicament is not going to come into fruition within the next 10 minutes...and yelling at me will not alleviate the problem at hand."

...was met with what seemed like an eternity of silence, before the customer responded with a resounding, "Huh?"

I think I've been doing too many crossword puzzles in between calls.

I've taken to standing up and pacing (as far as my cord will let me) when talking on the phone to difficult people. It's something I watched Doreen do a lot when I was in Dresden and I must say that it works. It really calms you down and makes you feel like you're in control and the bullshit will just start to fly out of your mouth.

That said, kiddies, the vocabulary word of the day is janky. It's an adjective used to describe stuff that is, in general, all effed up. Stuff like a fence that's been rebuilt by a man in his late 30s who's spent most of his life detailing cars, impregnating women, and...well...smoking (and/or selling) drugs.

However, I appreciate the effort made by my big bro, because it solves one of my immediate worries (at least temporarily)...and puts the ball in our neighbor's court now, cuz at the Brooks house we ain't scurred of no jank-ass fence.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

The Best Taco Bell in Germany

 Last weekend, I crossed off a major item on my bucket list. I went to Taco Bell in Germany. "But Raven, shouldn't you aspire to better, healthier things that have a measurable positive impact on society?" I know that's what you're thinking, but I don't really give a crap... because you are not the boss of me.  I wanted Taco Bell, because it's probably the one thing from back at home that I crave the most. Say what you want about it (again, I don't give a crap), but get at me when you've spent years away from your homeland and are unable to acquire whatever nasty-ass comfort food is available wherever you're from. For me, my nasty-ass comfort food of choice is Taco Bell...with Sonic a close second. However, you can't even find Sonic all over the U.S. and I don't find myself craving burgers and hot dogs all the time (plus, those urges are a lot easier to satisfy than a craving for Mexican or Tex-mex).

...and now a few words about German Rap #1

Hi, I know many of you don't know or care about German-language rap, but I do. And sometimes I want to write about it. Without proper context or introductions or explanations, it might be a little tough to follow it all. However, I'll try to throw in some wikipedia links. If you do listen to/are interested in German-language rap, then here's a chance to read some of my opinions. - Raven (Keeping in mind that I have no kind of statistics to back this up) But I think that Fettes Brot (the German hip-hop trio) is probably the most overall dissed group in the German rap scene. Notice I used the qualifier "group" because the most dissed individual would probably be Eko Fresh (sorry, Frosty ?)-- because, really, that dude has stepped on A LOT of toes in (comparatively) short amount of time. You could maybe make the same case with Die Fantastischen Vier , but it's hard to diss bajillionaires. I mean, ok, it's actually really easy to diss bajillionaires, just ha...

Horden

I went into the kitchen after work the other day to grab myself a bite to eat. Looking over at the window, I saw three or four black dots crawling over the window. Moving in for a closer look, I then saw that the dots were actually ladybugs ( Marienkäfer ). And my heart was like, "Awwww...ladybugs...cute" or whatever. It wasn't long before I noticed that it wasn't merely three or four ladybugs, but a swarm of them congregating in the upper right corner of the window frame. Easily multiple dozens of them. I had forgotten that this happened once the weather dropped. The same thing occurred last fall/winter and it freaked me out. There were just so many of them. In my mind, I immediately thought of my niece Gabi. She's 10 years old now and I really don't know what she likes anymore, but back in the day, whenever she saw a ladybug, she would kind of flip out. Her reaction wasn't fear, but rather like she was almost emotionally overtaken by the sheer beauty of ...