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Sunday, December 04, 2005

"B**ch, I ain't got nothin'"

"...and I ain't payin for shit, I'm on the grind ho"
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The "stupidest" thing I've said all day (aside from the conscious use of the word janky, which we'll get to in a bit):

"I apologize, sir, but a solution to your predicament is not going to come into fruition within the next 10 minutes...and yelling at me will not alleviate the problem at hand."

...was met with what seemed like an eternity of silence, before the customer responded with a resounding, "Huh?"

I think I've been doing too many crossword puzzles in between calls.

I've taken to standing up and pacing (as far as my cord will let me) when talking on the phone to difficult people. It's something I watched Doreen do a lot when I was in Dresden and I must say that it works. It really calms you down and makes you feel like you're in control and the bullshit will just start to fly out of your mouth.

That said, kiddies, the vocabulary word of the day is janky. It's an adjective used to describe stuff that is, in general, all effed up. Stuff like a fence that's been rebuilt by a man in his late 30s who's spent most of his life detailing cars, impregnating women, and...well...smoking (and/or selling) drugs.

However, I appreciate the effort made by my big bro, because it solves one of my immediate worries (at least temporarily)...and puts the ball in our neighbor's court now, cuz at the Brooks house we ain't scurred of no jank-ass fence.

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