Social Icons


Sunday, December 11, 2005

Meet the Brookses Part R (for Raven)

Everyone's Favorite Problemkind
Image hosted by

Probably sensing that I would be low on material this week, my brother Remy sent me a short list of questions to answer...and I obliged...because he's right.

Remy: What's it like being (technically) the middle child.

Rave: On one hand, I’d say it’s pretty easy, because it’s like I’ve had zero pressure to live up to typical parental expectations. On the other hand, because of that very thing, I’ve created a whole bunch of expectations for myself…which I kinda keep not meeting…oh well one day, I hope.

Remy: What's it like to be the "smart one" in the family.

Rave: It makes me feel sad. For the rest of you. Because I'm not smart. However, I’ll take “smart one” over “dumbass” anyday

Remy: What did you want to be when you grew up and what the fuck happened

Rave: Let's play a little game

What I wanted to be
Bass player or drummer in a rock band

What the fuck happened
years of piano lessons and playing brass instruments in the school band...before I discovered hip-hop

What I wanted to be
Some kind of sciencey person

What the fuck happened
numbers and math joined forces against me

What I wanted to be

What the fuck happened
really bad eyesight

What I wanted to be

What the fuck happened
lack of hand/eye coordination

What I wanted to be
One of the people on stage repeating every other line the MC says

What the fuck happened
not in a rich rapper’s inner-circle…yet

What I wanted to be
Phone Sex Operator

What the fuck happened
…I’m one digit away from working for a 900-number…start crossing your fingers…this could be it!

Remy: Grape juice or purple drank?

Rave: Tough call. Grape juice always reminds me of those tiny ass plastic thimble cup thingies that they used to pass out during communion at church... but grape drank...yeah we had some good times with that shit back in the day. I want that purple stuff, baby! (preferrably in the form of grape THAT is my shit!)

Remy: The most exciting random thing you've done while drunk and/or high

Rave: Oh the stories I could tell... but I'll just stick to the "non-offensive" ones... that I can remember. During my final days at Smith, me and people from King House (Sophia and Siobahn...and I forget who else) we were choppin it up sitting on the patio furniture behind King/Scales, drinking beer and whatnot. At some point we had the idea to go smoke a bowl on the patio/balcony thingy of the Alumnae House. I was due for a bathroom break long before we headed out, but I didn't want to ruin the moment. But then later, after the bowl and another beer or two, I couldn't hold it any, we think we heard Public Safety coming (or we could have just been paranoid). Anyway, I really had to go...and someone was just like, "Find some bushes". So, I did and I went...but walking away the whole big picture came into view and I realized I just peed on some random bush in front of the Alumnae House.

I thought it was a very befitting way to end my Smith career. I know, Rem...public urination isn't a big deal for you...but it was more about the subconscious statement that I made...and I'm sure you'd just rather not hear about the other things that sprang to mind.

[Edit: Oh I just remembered about the time me and André went to this med student party (Won's idea) and we got drunk (cause it was lame), then on the walk home, we saw these two road signs on like tripod pole-type construction thingies and walked all the way home in the rain with them and left them in the hallway of the 4th floor of the dorm...until Herr Koch or someone took them away. This was also the same evening that we invented the melted cheese and fried onion sammich -- because I only had bread in my fridge and he only had cheese and's that for random and exciting? Ok, I know, not very.]

Remy: What really grinds your gears

Rave: To quote the immortal words of 2pac, "I can't stand fake ass bitches, lyin ass niggas and you punk ass snitches..."

Remy: For what reason do you believe Crew 52 is superior to Laos Crew, besides the fact you're all a bunch of uppity bitches.

Rave: The #1 reason? Me. Of course, I represent Crew 52, biatch...and at this juncture, I will kindly ask you to peep the title of this blog, one mo' gin. But seriously, if you'd just open your eyes, you'd see the similarities between the two...let's increase the peace, homes...

Remy: If you got served ( you know like in the movie), who would you want it
to be from.

Rave: No, Rem...I don't know "like in the movie"...but if we're talking about a dance off...then I'd prefer to be served by Robbyn. I'd pop n' lock her back to last week...shiiiiiiit...

Remy: Tell me what you think about my Food Network series and come up with an idea of your own. Mine's a BBQ cook off show and the winner gets to go up to the loser and say "You just got served..............Barbecue!" and then slap the shit out of 'em.

Rave: That sounds hot...I like the mixture of food and violence. I'd have a show kinda like'd be like a mixture of Iron Chef and Fight Club...I'd call it Iron Food Fight. It'd be hosted by that dude who used to host Double Dare on Nickelodeon and now hosts Unwrapped on FN. Each week I'd pit two Food Network cooks against each other in a battle to the death, using only common items found around the kitchen...the winner cooks me dinner. First up: That skinny bitch from Everyday Italian vs. Paula Muthafuckin Deen. My money's on P-Dizzle.

Image hosted by

Remy: Your fondest memory with Remy and Tunde

Rave: So many to choose you'd invite me to come along while you and Tunde went to the mall to holla at white bitches...good times reminiscing listening to 3EB...probably, I'd have to say that one summer where I was at home for 10 days and I stayed with you and Tunde and Danny at your apartment and we smoked and laughed and watched Zoolander all day, everyday. And we kept clowning Danny cause he's dumb...but his mom sold weed so you kept him around, but then we'd leave the apartment and tell him that we were going to pick up dinner but really we just drove to the other end of the apartment complex, smoked up in the Explorer and then drove back to the other side all high and with no food.

Can't wait for you to come home!

No comments: