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Monday, May 08, 2006

On the fifth day, there was quesadillas and beer...

...and it was pretty fuckin delish.

I know it always sounds messed up when I say this, seeing as how it's Sunday and most of you are gearing up for another week of work. But for me it's Thursday and I must say that this has been one really long week that went by surprisingly fast. It's amazing how prescription painkillers make time fly...and drag. It's an odd feeling, as you can see. Unfortunately, I'm all out of my little white happy pills, so it's back to our regularly scheduled program.

After five days of subsisting on soup and applesauce, I finally felt brave enough to put solid food in my mouth. So, I went down to Taco Cabana and got me a steak quesadilla. It's mostly solid, right? Anyway, nothing accompanies mexican food like some freakin' cerveza. The eating part was certainly awkward...but mama washed it down with some of her "medicine".

Presently, I'm just sitting here looking at a little white envelope containing my wisdom tooth, asking myself why in the holy hell did I say I wanted to keep this thing?! I can tell you this much, rational thought wasn't really behind the decision, seeing as how A.) I'm currently in the process of reducing the amount of unnecessary shit in my life and B.) I've had this mofo under my pillow for five nights and I've gotten zilch from the tooth fairy. C'mon, you stingy bitch, this thing has been accumulating some major interest for a few years and I could use the extra income right about now...

I was going to take a picture of the tooth, but then, in addition to realizing that no one really wants to see that kinda crap, I thought it just wasn't cute. Though I'm not one to strive for maximum cuteness, I do want to keep the puking-in-your-own-mouthage to a minimum.

This, of course, does not apply to MS-Paint renderings of my extracted tooth:

Why don't we just call this Side A
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...Side B will rip your fucking face off
Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

I don't know, maybe I'm losing my touch, but I just don't see any practical use for keeping it around...other than freaking out little kids. On the other hand, I just may not have given it enough thought.

Secretly I kinda want to carve it into an itty-bitty statue thingy, so I can put it on a necklace and wear it around my neck...but you and I both know, I don't wear necklaces...

...unless there's a giant Mercedes symbol attached to them

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