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Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Worse than a debt collection agency?

A slight interruption in the programming schedule.

I don't check my myspace page all too often anymore (maybe once a week, which much less than the frequency with which I check facebook *sigh*)

Well, today I did and I found the following message in my inbox from Zoe, my 9-year-old niece:

Hi Auntie!!!
How are you?
I hope to see you soon.....Oh and you owe me and Gabi $40.00!....So come see us soon because I want my money!!!!

Here's several reasons why I dug this approach:

1.) It caught me off guard. Apparently, in the almost 3 years since I've been away, the child has not only mastered writing, but also typing (not to mention usage of improper/unnecessary ellipses -- I'm feelin' that...)

2.) The opener: She wants to know how I'm doing. Awww, sweet.

3.) The subtle brown-nosing tactic: She wants to see me soon. Double awww, she misses her auntie!

4.) Then she gets straight to the point: In her mind, we have a long standing debt to settle. I'm assuming this was accumulated from past/missed birthdays and Christmas. 

5.) Lastly, she reminds me of the benefit of visiting back home (seeing my "sweet" nieces), while firmly restating the business matter at hand ("I want my money!")

This totally reminds me of the time where the collection agency handling my student loans called me up. And it's just as scary when hearing it from a child, despite the fact that the amount of money in question is far, far less. Gillian -- I think your daughter has found her calling. 

That said, get in line kid. I sent some treats from Germany (see Auntie Pickles) and that will have to tide you over for now. Plus, let's not get into how much money you owe me for MY services rendered (namely babysitting, diaper changing and mental anguish due to extreme exposure to Teletubbies and the like). 

How you like them apples?

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