Yoink!

Wouldn't you know it? I'm finally getting around to looking into considering getting a domain for the ol' bloggity blog and my preferred choice is taken! And all I wanted to do was save everyone the time of having to type the 8 characters that make up blogspot. Oh well. As usual, it sucks to be all of us.

I should have jumped on that back when I first had the idea, because it was totally available then. I know, I looked into it and everything. I just had like zero monies to actually make it happen.

And now...it's too goddamn late.

I suppose I could blame Jack's complete and utter lack of originality (wherein I am Jack's). As you know, when you arrive at my blog, the title graphic reads "If it's not Raven, it's crap". And from there, if you know anything about classic Saturday Night Live sketches, then you know that I totally ripped it off of pre-Shrek-and-Fat-Bastard-and-So-I-Married-an-Axe-Murderer-late-80s-SNL-Mike-Myers. Here's an example with the guy who played the Kwisatz Haderach (nerd alert!)




What can I say? It was a witty (and fitting) play on that catchphrase.

However, the actual address is sickpimpin.blogspot.com, which is a reference to one of my favorite Atmosphere songs "Good Times (Sick Pimpin)". Like many, I'm partial to quoting song lyrics, hence naming my first blog after the lyrics in the Lita Ford song "Kiss me Deadly" ("I went to a party last Saturday night/I didn't get laid, I got in a fight")

And, well, after my year in Dresden, things in OKC weren't all that much of an improvement, so I chose the "sick pimpin" part of the Atmosphere track for my current blog...precisely because it wasn't a good time ("I'm still smiling / Still up to no great, still tryin' to relocate / Somewhere I'm gonna find some work that matters / Till then all you get is my smirk and my laughter")



In my eyes, my blog is called "Sick Pimpin: If it's not Raven, it's crap". So, I really wanted to get the domain sickpimpin.com. And now, 7 years later and finding myself with a teeny bit of cash flow (so that it's not entirely unfeasible to get my own domain), I revisited the topic.

Turns out, I slept on that. The domain is taken. Luckily(?), it was taken by -- and I shit you not -- some crazy mockumentary horror film about a reality show gone wrong. I can't even be that mad about it, because it's sort of awesome. An entirely insaneo, cray-cray sort of awesome. If some rapper had snatched it up, I think my saltiness levels would go through the roof.

But no. That's not what happened. I typed in sickpimpin.com and was forwarded to this Facebook page about something called "Tontine Massacre"



From that image, you can tell that it's some type of horror movie bullshit that I can't fucking stand. However, from the name...well...I won't lie, it sounded like some crazy Star Wars shit.

Because I was thinking of some fucking "I thought they smelled bad on the outside" tauntauns. (Manchmal, aber nur manchmal...I'm a walking nerd alert). Just a bunch of tauntauns getting sliced to shreds.


Yeah, go to the Dagobah System after you get inside your ride, homie. Warm your shit up in those bubble guts!

Whatever, it's not about that. It's like some Blair Witch Project shenanigans + a reality TV show where some fools pool their own life savings to battle it out Survivor-style (I guess)...and then shit goes wrong. That's my synopsis. I haven't actually seen the movie, I'm just salty that they snatched up my domain.

I suppose shipwrecking on a deserted island with only the prospect of winning $10 million dollars of other people's life savings does fit in with the alternate meaning of "Good Times (Sick Pimpin)". That sounds like the shittiest of times to me. So props to those guys...

TL;DR - Looks like I've gotta come up with a new idea for a domain name.