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Filler Post #43 - Yoink!

There's this German magazine called Blond that I've occasionally been known to flip through. It's mostly kind of hit or miss with me in terms of their monthly theme. However, one thing in it that I always like to read is a very short column called "Jake's 12" by Jake the Rapper (who's also a DJ...and an American...and very nice, from what SupaD has told me).

I found his column this month to be particularly funny and I'd like to share (though I feel that's also slightly less than legal). I also apologzie in advance to those of you reading this, who can't read German. Normally, I'd translate, but I have the feeling that it wouldn't help you really understand it anyway.

But I'll make it up to you, I pinky swear...

(Click Below for More)

Hm, unfortunately, the scanner isn't working, so I'm just gonna retype it. It ain't that long.

Jakes 12! Produktnamen
Bei diesen Markennamen frage ich mich, was sie mir wohl sagen wollen:

01. Bauerngut Wurst(b)engel: Oh Mann, jetzt gibt's bescheuerte Kabarettistenwitze auch noch im Supermarkt.
02. Hipp Hippness Crisp: Hipness kommt nicht aus einer Tüte. Mann muss dazu auch viele Zigaretten rauchen.
03. Froop: Kombination aus "fruit" und ...was? "poop"? "gloop"? Sorry, nur unschöne Wörter enden mit "-oop".
04. Flotte Biene: Eine Flasche mit Honigdurchfall und furzendem Schließmuskel-Spender. Klar: "Flotte Biene"!
05. Cola + Bier = Misery, ähm, Mixery, meine ich. Schmeckt echt mixerabel.
06. Back & Roll: Noch ein Grund für Elvis, sich im Grabe rumzudrehen...
07. World of Nuts: Ha! Genau! Es ist wirklich eine Welt voller Verrückter.
08. Vitakraft Katzenmilch: Welche arme Sau melkt denn die ganzen Katzen? Muss ja ewig dauern...
09. Whiskas Senior in Sauce: Ist die Rentenversicherung so schlecht, dass die jetzt Senioren an Hunde verfüttern?
10. Deutschland Würstchen: "...knackig wie Wiener." Oops, ist Wien in Deutschland?
11. Du darfst: Ach, und wer sind Sie denn überhaupt, mir zu sagen, was ich darf? Und mich gleich noch zu duzen!
12. Schovit Kakao: Are you telling me to shove it up my ass? Das ist mir einen Hauch zu obszön!

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