I'm gonna go with "or what (the f***?!)"?

*...and then my brain exploded*

Don't get me wrong, for the most part, I like being from Oklahoma. It's where I was born and raised, the cost of living is real, real low...and a good portion of the fam lives here.

But sometimes this place makes me want to scream. Or puke. Take your pick.

On occasion, I like to know what's going on in the news and around the world and such. Usually this craving arises over a bowl of cereal or a cup of coffee, and I find it convenient to keep some kind of newssource at hand.

I feel fortunate enough to not have to rely on The Daily Oklahoman for all of my news...not even really most of my news. Simply put, this publication sucks male genitalia of monster-sized proportions. In what kind of crackhead fantasy do NBA ticket sales trump a major (and "relatively nearby") city's evacuation?

Under the "GOING NOWHERE" headline is basically just a large picture of the traffic jam on I-45 out of Houston. Actual written coverage of the story doesn't really appear until page 4. But damn, isn't it great?! We done gone and got ourselves an NBA team...and the tickets are selling like hotcakes! Fuck this state's newspaper. They might as well write something like:

Dear Texas,

what's up? We just wanted to let you know that should Texans feel the need to evacuate to our state, then they will be welcomed with open arms.

And when we say "Texans" we mean your NFL team, the Houston Texans. Or the Astros, for that matter...and, oh yes, the Rockets. We'll take what you got. *Coughsuckerscough*

Your Pal,

Oklahoma

*see title*

Anyway, my thoughts and prayers go out to Jen's parents and grandmother. I'm also glad that Pam is in Hamburg and that my sister and her family don't live in Galveston any more...and in general I hope everything will be ok.

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The Best Taco Bell in Germany

Last weekend, I crossed off a major item on my bucket list. I went to Taco Bell in Germany. "But Raven, shouldn't you aspire to better, healthier things that have a measurable positive impact on society?" I know that's what you're thinking, but I don't really give a crap... because you are not the boss of me. I wanted Taco Bell, because it's probably the one thing from back at home that I crave the most. Say what you want about it (again, I don't give a crap), but get at me when you've spent years away from your homeland and are unable to acquire whatever nasty-ass comfort food is available wherever you're from. For me, my nasty-ass comfort food of choice is Taco Bell...with Sonic a close second. However, you can't even find Sonic all over the U.S. and I don't find myself craving burgers and hot dogs all the time (plus, those urges are a lot easier to satisfy than a craving for Mexican or Tex-mex).

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The One Who Got Away (Part 6): PLOT TWIST

Quick Translation: This confirms that German citizenship will not be opposed, if within two years it can be verified that the aforementioned person no longer possesses citizenship for Trinidad and Tobago e and/or has fulfilled the requirements for the loss of this citizenship and that nothing has happened in the meantime, which would forbid naturalization. I almost forgot what it felt like to receive a industrial size dose of 100% homegrown German bureaucratic pedantry. Luckily, the German authorities will never leave you too long without a fix. You can count on that. As you can see from the picture above (and from my previous posts), Trinidad and Tobago e had only been mentioned once in passing up until now, when I finalized my application and paid the fee. Mr. S: Your mother was naturalized in the U.S. after you were born? Me: Yes, but she never applied for Trinidadian citizenship for me, which would have had to have been done by my 18th birthday. Mr. S: Ok. (Ac

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The One Who Got Away (Part 5)

Pro tip: Don't estimate the amount of time it will take to review your citizenship application based on the amount of time it took to get the results of your citizenship test. So far, this has been the area of the German-side of the process that ran a little closer to my bureaucratic expectations, namely, if an official expresses a length of time -- e.g. 3-6 months -- things will start moving closer to the six month mark than the three month mark. Getting down to the wire, I was (and still am) slightly concerned that this would drag on and I would have to renew my U.S. passport first, since it's getting kinda close to the point where it's only valid for six months. This would have cost me 1.) more money 2.) plus a trip to a consulate that actually does shit for U.S. citizens 3.) money and time off work for a trip to Bremen, Berlin, or Frankfurt. As luck would have it, I finally received notification that the Germans are letting me in! The full term is that they are

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If it's not Raven, it's crap...

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