Apartment Daaaaaaaance!

You'd think that the traumatic Slip N' Slide accident I experienced as a child would have made me very weary of slippery surfaces, when actually it only made me very weary of slippery surfaces involving water (in liquid or solid form) and the sharp objects possibly lurking beneath them (waiting to slash me open).

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One of my favorite things in the world (I'd say at least right up there in my Top 10) are smooth floors and sliding around in them in my socks. I love doing this and I don't know why. While the floors in my old apartment in Barmbek were surprisingly decent for this purpose, the shiny new laminate flooring in my new place is far superior. Another thing I love is dancing (somewhat spastically) when alone in my apartment. The two of these things in combination -- ability to slide around on the floor and the apartment dancing -- are pretty much my secret hobby. Probably not so much a secret now, since...we STILL have no curtains.

My signature "dance move" is a little something I call "The Apartment Dance" -- which is supposed to be slightly reminiscent of The Typewriter, except your feet never lose contact with the ground. You just shuffle from left to right while shouting, "Apartment Daaaaaaaance! Apartment Daaaaaance!" It's typically the way that I enter the living room, when I know that Schmidt is in there doing work at his desk. He gets a real kick out of it...or he's just really good at humoring my bizarreness. I think it's the first one, because the other night we apartment danced together for a little bit...before realizing it was about 10pm and that, again, we have no curtains.

Anyway, here are three songs that I've been apartment dancing to for the last couple of days:

1.) James Brown - Sex Machine (Readymade Jazz Defectors Remix)

I really think that old uptempo soul/funk songs were pretty much invented so that people (read: idiots) like me can dance around in their socks on a smooth floor. You can get the same effect with pretty much any Breakestra track. However, I think I'm going to make remix this the official Apartment Dance Song.



2.) Pigeon John - Do the Pigeon

Last week, I started bumping that Pigeon John and the Summertime Pool Party album. It's a highly enjoyable album and helps me forget that it's nearly August and we've had like maybe (tops) 3 weeks of summery-type days. Plus you can't really go wrong with Quannum Records and amusing mulatto rappers with a penchant for name-dropping Taco Bell in their lyrics.



3.) Gym Class Heroes - It's OK But Just This Once

I was wanting to go see Gym Class Heroes at Knust on Monday, but I kinda slept on that. Plus, I was still fairly worn out from the weekend. Oh well, hopefully I'll have another chance. Tunde was the person who first made me aware of them and told me to ask their MC to join The Revolution. However, all mulattos are automatically part of The Revolution. I could do with a little less of his dropping the words "So sexy" into every song, even though he pretty much is...but I feel as though this is rather superfluous, as every one knows that all mulattos are, indeed, so sexy.




BONUS: Song of the Year

4.) Dujeous - Beer

I don't really apartment dance to this song, but I really love it. First of all, it's a beer appreciation song. Second of all, it's a motherfucking beer appreciation song! I mean, I love the song "Beer" by Reel Big Fish, but that's just mostly describing bad circumstances that drive a person to drink. This track, however, is about drinking beer for the pure love of beer. The chorus pretty much sums up my feelings about everything and everyone:

You ask me am I goin out steppin
You got beer?
Put a 22 in my stomach
We goin where?
Put a six-pack in my hand
Ay yo, I'm there...
I ain't doin nothin that doesn't involve beer...

Plus, the song starts out with a sample from the very awesome movie Beerfest ...gotta love that, right? Now, I don't know a whole lot about the group Dujeous, but they're a live hip-hop band and you can download their Game 7 mixtape for free here and I think it's pretty dope.